Sometime around my sophomore year of high school I began watching television and film differently. I didn't consciously realize at the time that I wanted to make my living as an actor and a writer in this business, but something was telling that I needed to start paying even more attention to things than I already did. Once I started doing that the actors, writers, and directors of my favorite big and small screen creations began to ingrain themselves in my brain. The stories became something more than just a way to escape. They were a way to relate, to create, and to live.
The list of the people I look up to in film and television, that I admire and strive to emulate, is long. It's weird wide range of folks. It's actors from Steve Buscemi to John Hamm. Writers like Matt Weiner and Aaron Sorkin. Directors like Frank Darabont and Tim Van Patten. These are the people whose stuff used to keep me up at night, and not just because I'm in bed with a joint and a Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream Bar re-watching season three of The Sopranos. They kept me awake because they're so fucking good at what they do that I'd lay there and wonder, "Will I ever be that good at what I do?"
There is one director/writer/actor though that I didn't mention above whose work I've always really dug. Roughly nineteen years ago, a kid in his early 20's from New Jersey dropped out of film school. He wrote a script about his shitty job. He sold his comic book collection, maxed out some credit cards, and borrowed some cash from family and friends. He raised just over $39,000 and made a movie. Twenty years later and he's still banging out great stuff. Now, more than ever I'm a fan of Kevin Smith.
Maybe it's because I love his movies or because I think he's simply an awesome storyteller. Maybe because we both used to do our school shopping in the husky section. Maybe it's because we kinda look alike. Several times over the years people have told me I look like him. (When you're chubby, people always love to tell you you look like famous chubby people. They really do.) I didn't realize how strong the resemblance must be until a few years ago. I was in the process of moving from PA to NY. I had stopped by my grandmother's house to see her and pick up a few things I had been storing there. I had a framed Dogma poster I had gotten as a Christmas gift a few years earlier. My Grandmother noticed me taking it out to the U-Haul. She asked, "Is that from one of your plays?" "This," I said holding up the picture. "Yeah," she said. "That's you right?" pointing at Kevin Smith. I grew up across the street from my grandmother. She's a second mother to me. There she was standing next to me in her living room, unable to tell her only grandson apart from Silent Bob. I looked at her and said, "Yup, it's from one of my plays." Then I packed it up. I thought it was easier that way.
What I do really admire about the guy though, is the fact that he's a survivor in this shitty business. Even after a panned flick here and there, being the punchline of a seasons worth of jokes on Entourage, and the center of a news story, the Southwest incident, that would make any big man crawl in bed with a bag of Cheetos and a box of tissues for the next decade, the guy is still out working his ass off.
Red State, which was released by Smith himself in 2011, was a balls out topical horror flick full of pretty incredible acting and writing. Comic Book Men premiered on AMC earlier this year and Kevin's podcasts are hilarious and plentiful. While I'm glad to see the dude doing his thing in several mediums, there was a sound byte of his I came across recently that I haven't stopped thinking about since I heard it. It shook me up. It's been on my mind a lot and influencing the way I approach trying to carve out a career in this business and living my life in general. I thought I'd share it with you dear reader friends in the hopes that you might have the same reaction I did. Follow the link below.
Click Here To Listen On Youtube
It's this sound byte that made me decide to dedicate today's blog to Mr. Smith. It's his words that now keep me up at night, but instead of wondering if I'll be as good as this one or that one, I simply wonder if I put the same attitude toward my craft today, that Kevin Smith put toward his. Since I got on board with this train of thought, I've been a hell of a lot busier; I'm a firm believer that in this business, in life in general, it's good to be busy.
Snoochie Boochies Gang
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