Ya know what's cool nowadays? Being green. I can dig that. We all need to do our part in order to help clean up this big blue marble we call home. A huge part of that is recycling. Like nearly everyone I know these days, I separate my trash into the appropriate bins in the hopes of leaving this place a nicer spot to graze for future generations. It's a pretty amazing thing really. The milk carton you drank from today becomes the pair of weird shoes you buy at Whole Foods tomorrow. I thought I'd take it a step further though, and recycle some of my favorite 80's terms just sitting in the pop culture landfill that is my brain. I encourage you to do the same. Enjoy and reuse.
Warp Zone - Made famous in the 1980's by the Super Mario Bros. as a way to travel between worlds/levels on the game.
Recycled - A way of referring to getting black out drunk and not remembering how you got from one place to another.
Example - "One minute I was at the bar and the next I was throwing up outside WaWa. I took a Warp Zone, bro."
Gleaming the Cube - Movie about Skateboarding starring Christian Slater made popular in 1989.
Recycled - Spending too much time in one day masturbating on the internet.
Example - "I was supposed to go to the bank, do laundry, and hit the gym, but I got caught up Gleaming the Cube all afternoon."
Prince Adam - He-Man's quiet purple pants wearing alter ego.
Recycled - What to call your buddy if he's being hesitant about talking to a girl or group of girls, either for his own benefit or good of the group.
Example - "She's hot. Get over there Prince Adam!"
April O'Neil - Female reporter friend of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
Recycled - A lady who has had sexual relations with all of the male members in a particular circle of friends.
Example - "Of course she will. She's our April O'Neil."
Macho Man and Miss Elizabeth - WWF icon and his sexy manager/wife.
Recycled - Any couple who works out together at the gym.
Example - "I was hoping to use the cable crossover but Macho Man and Miss Elizabeth are hogging it."
Cobra Kai - The bad guy dojo who abused Daniel in the Karate Kid.
Reboot - Any traveling pack of douche bags who are nowhere near as cool or charming as they perceive themselves to be.
Example - "Get a load of the Cobra Kai from Morgan Stanley over there at the corner table. I hope they wipe that cocaine off their polos next time they head to the bathroom for a popped collar check."
Flux Capacitor - Sits in the center of the DeLorean in Back to the Future. It's what makes time travel possible.
Recycled - Your favorite device for smoking weed.
Example - "I just bought some great stuff from, Glen. It's packed and ready to go over there in the flux capacitor."
Tori Scott - Character from Saved by the Bell who appeared for the first half of season 5 and replaced Kelly Kapowski as Zack's object of affection.
Recycled - A new menu item at you favorite restaurant that has, to your disappointment, replaced an item you once adored.
Example - "I thought you were getting the buffalo chicken wrap?"
"They took it off the menu. I had to get the Ranch Roll Up."
"Any good?"
"Complete Tori Scott."
Jet Wash - What ultimately leads to Goose's death in Top Gun. Maverick accidentally flies through Iceman's Jet Wash causing the plane to go into a spin, requiring him and Goose to eject.
Recycled - When you're walking behind someone who lets go of a fart that hits you directly in the face.
Example - "What's wrong?"
"I think I flew through that old lady's Jet Wash leaving JCPenny's."
Johnny Castle - Swazey's character from Dirty Dancing who tangoed his way into the hearts of Baby and the rest of America in 1987.
Recycled - Your friend who consistently dates girls who are way too young for him.
Example - "Lets go to McDonald's and wait for the high school dance to let out."
"You're bein a Johnny Castle right now, Aaron."
Moonwalk - Dance move made famous by Michael Jackson where you glide backwards on the bottom of your feet.
Recycled - When you awkwardly bounce around while walking in hopes to stifle an embarrassing itch somewhere in your undercarriage.
Example - "HA! You're totally moonwalking right now."
"Suck My Wake" - Name of the Jet Boat rented by Dan Aykroyd's character in the great outdoors.
Recycled - Can be used in an argument in place of classics like "F#ck You" or "Kiss My Ass."
Example - "The Wizard is a terrible movie."
"Suck my wake!"
Wolf Buddy - Term coined by Styles in Teen Wolf for someone who is a fan of his furry friend Scott Howard.
Recycled - Any friend of mine.
Example - "Do you read The Fat Kid Chronicles?"
"Oh yeah. I'm a total Wolf Buddy."
Happy Wednesday Gang.
This is awesome.
ReplyDeleteYour wolf buddy.